 |
|
| Odd Blogs Just about every newspaper has a section devoted to the weird and wonderful goings on in the World. Quite often they're referred to as "Odd Spots". Of course there's more to the story waiting to be told. It justs needs a little irrational thought to read between the lines and see THE REAL STORY... |
|
|
Monday, March 31, 2003 LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE Monday March 31, 2003 Tall tales of hunting and fishing exploits could be a thing of the past in America's Midwest. The town of Mount Sterling, Iowa, plans to ban its 40 residents from telling lies. I was very happy to read this. America finally seems to be taking steps towards becoming a respected member of the community of planet Earth. Hopefully this trend will extend all the way to the Whitehouse and the Pentagon. Maybe one day we'll find out the truth about how George W Bush became president without getting the majority of votes and the real reason to why he sent the troops into invade Iraq. Of course the most important truth we all want to know is why they replaced Samantha's husband in Bewitched with a completely different guy and then acted as if nothing has changed. posted by Steve | 5:06 AM DARK MATTER Monday March 24, 2003 The latest fad to hit New York's singles scene is "Dinner in the Dark", a gourmet meal served and eaten in darkness. Only the waiters, wearing night-vision goggles, can see what's going on. What's so new about this? Americans have been keeping themsleves in the dark for decades. posted by Steve | 4:57 AM MMMMM BARBEQUE Thursday March 20, 2003 Scientists have discovered why the air quality in Houston is so poor: the atmosphere over the self-proclaimed "barbecue capital of Texas" is thick with minuscule pieces of flame-grilled meat. The US government is hoping next week to proclaim Baghdad as the Barbeque Capital of the Middle East. Rumour has it that the BBQ King, George Foreman has been commisioned to create some tantalising tasty treats from Saddam's moustache. posted by Steve | 4:54 AM BLOODY RE-PUBLICANS The Age, Wednesday March 19, 2003 British consumers are losing millions of pounds a year because publicans are failing to pour full pints of beer, according to a national audit by the Government's spending watchdog. Clever doggy. Hunt down those bastards that are denying us our beer and tear them all new arseholes! posted by Steve | 4:47 AM Wednesday, March 19, 2003 SOLDIER ON - Part 2 A Romanian soldier who collapsed on the parade ground has been diagnosed as suffering from acute sexual frustration. Adrian Busureanu, who's 21, collapsed and started convulsing uncontrollably at a barracks in Valcea, Romania. After carrying out exhaustive tests to find the cause of the problem, doctors at a military hospital diagnosed Busureanu as suffering from an "acute case of sexual frustration". A spokesman said: "He became feverish, delusional and finally hysterical after being apart from his girlfriend for two months. He was suffering from hysteria induced by sexual frustration." One doctor at the military hospital told local paper 'Libertatea': "He was brought to us at the peak of his crisis. "We managed to bring him back to normal and then discovered this was all because he was sexually frustrated." Busureanu told doctors being apart from his girlfriend for so long had been unbearable: "I haven't seen her since I came here two months ago. It is impossible," he said. But he is unlikely to get relief soon. In Romania compulsory military service runs for between six and 12 months Obviously this soldier needs to see some action soon. But not with those skanky syphilis ridden slappers that are hanging around the US bases. posted by Steve | 11:22 AM SOLDIER ON - Part 1 Romanian police have launched a military-style operation to keep prostitutes away from US troops. Officers in Constanta are running round-the-clock patrols and raiding brothels to stop prostitutes meeting US soldiers who have recently arrived at a nearby airbase. Head of the Constanta police, Traian Jipa, told Libertatea: "We have organised day and night raids and patrols in areas where prostitutes usually gather. "We want to test all the prostitutes we can to see if they have any sexually transmitted diseases. "We have already taken 10 girls aged 19 to 33 into custody and tests have showed that they all have syphilis. They are a real danger to anyone's health." The paper said officers feared prostitutes from other parts of the country could be heading to the city to "make a fast buck" by having sex with American soldiers. Over 4,000 US soldiers are currently based in Constanta as the build-up for a possible attack on Iraq continues. Local media say another 1,000 troops will arrive next week. Well that's an original way to protest about the USA invasion of Iraq. posted by Steve | 11:16 AM COME BACK BILL. WE MISS YOU How is it possible that America can go from having a dope smoking sex maniac as President to a war munger in such a short time? Bill Clinton was almost kicked out of the Whitehouse for having uncontrollable sexual urges. Before all that he was in the shit for admitting he sampled a bit of hooch back in the 60's. All Bill was guilty of was just being a fun loving guy. So what if he stained a young ladies dress or found other uses for cigars, these are qualities all good leaders should have. Anyone can start a fight but not everyone can convince a 20 or so year old girl to give you a blow job under the desk or stick a cigar into her pussy. George W Bush is either hated or laughed at all around the world and there hasn't been one word of impeachment. I wonder if Al Qaeda would have attacked America if someone other than George Bush was voted in as President... assuming he was actually voted in and didn't buy or sell himself in. I know which President I'd like my children to grow up to be like. Sorry to anyone who is sick of the recent political slant I've displayed on Odd Blogs. It's difficult not to have an opinion when a war is being waged that seems to be opposed by the majority of the population of this planet we share. From now on I will try to return to the quirky and light-hearted style that Odd Blogs was intended to be... I wonder what those whacky Romanians are up to??? posted by Steve | 2:16 AM Tuesday, March 18, 2003 48 HOURS George W Bush, President of the United States of America, has been given 48 hours to prove he's not a Complete Fucking Moron. However most people believe that he will not comply and will therefore go down in history as the possibly the world's most infamous Complete Fucking Moron, closely followed by British Priminister Tony Blair and Australian Priminister John Howard. posted by Steve | 10:39 AM |
|
| ||||||||||||||||||
